Wednesday, April 11, 2007

When in Doubt On Whether To Stay or To Go

from The Creative Manifesting free newsletter i subscribe to:

Quick Manifesting Morsels with Anisa Aven:

Q: I love your site and your devotion to helping others manifest their dreams! I always get so excited when I get your newsletter because I know it will have some helpful hint I need that day!! I have a question about the law of attraction and manifesting. I find that I can easily manifest things I do not have a strong attachment to, but when it comes to big things, like relationships, I am not so lucky.

For years I have been hanging onto a relationship with a guy I believe to be my soul mate, only it has been a rollercoaster of emotions and feelings, some good and some bad. It is heartbreaking to me because I feel like I have all the tools to create the beautiful, romantic soul mate relationship I desire with this person but I can't seem to get it right. I know I cannot control his feelings but am I wrong to think that the law of attraction can help this situation? I know I should just focus on the relationship I desire instead of the face it comes with, but I feel so strongly attached to this person and want to experience the love I desire with him. Any insight you have would be so much appreciated. Thanks for all you do!

- Erin

A: Thank you for your kind words, Erin.

When we focus on what we want, what we desire, we send forth an energetic signal that is creative. However, that signal is not vibrationally aligned with what we say we want but instead it is aligned with 'the longing' for what we want. Desire is a descending emotion filled with longing, an intense wish for something that we feel separate from.

It's the experience of separation that prevents us from intentionally creating. As long as we feel separate from the essence of our desire, we vibrate in opposition to it.

"You can't have what you want." - God, in A Conversation with God by Neale Donald Walsch

You have to change your 'wanting' to 'accepting'.

The 'trick' to re-creating a relationship is to be willing to never have that relationship be that which you say you want. (emphases mine.) Instead you must be willing to focus on the experience of love and fulfillment that is the essence of your true desire.

This translates to sheer willingness to accept whatever is, as exactly what's meant to be. It means being willing to let this relationship go; and to be willing to accept it exactly as it is, as perfect in and of itself, even if it never changes.

From this willingness, your thoughts soften and a greater sense of tranquility will prevail. Within this state of mind lies the energetic framework required to inspire and attract the real relationship you want, the essence of your real desire.

The framework I'm referring to is an intention to unconditionally love and accept your partner exactly as they are, filled with the wonder of life as one of God's perfect Divine souls.

For as you send forth real love and light, you free their inner being to return the love.

From the 72 Names of God, by Yehuda Berg:

"�You must offer unconditional love and true light to your friends and even those you see as enemies if you want to receive peace and serenity in your own life. You must see the soul of the other person and connect to it.

�the key to this Universal law is the offering of true light and unconditional kindness. The reason is, unconditional love and authentic light immediately penetrate the soul of the other party, awakening love and light in return."

Now, you'll notice that I used the word 'trick' above because that's exactly what you're doing. You are tricking your thoughts into a place of greater vibrational illumination.

Of course, there are times when it's simply more comfortable to move away from what is than to re-create it. Re-creating a relationship, a job, or a health issue, for example, when we are steeped in the diagnosis of 'the way that it is' requires a great deal of courage, attention, intention, time, and faith.

I won't say that I haven't taken the easier road at times because I have. When my children's doctor didn't believe in naturopathic options, I didn't try to 're-create' that relationship; I didn't use the law of attraction to inspire him to come around.

In this situation the path of least resistance was simply finding a doctor that was more aligned with my family's beliefs.

Long standing relationships will be more challenging to re-create because of their 'story'; because the relationship has so much history and evidence to prove it is the way it is.

My current relationship is the best I've ever had. I feel madly in love, cherished, cared for, and passionate about our future. When he's away, I can't wait for him to get home.

My brother borrowed him for two weekends in a row to help build a storage shed. (Unfortunately, people are always borrowing my honey because he's pretty crafty with a hammer.) By the 2nd weekend, I was a little pest calling them both and whining, "When are you going to be done? What about me?!?!"

My brother said, "I didn't know you were that needy!?!" I just giggled because the truth is I'm the furthest thing from needy but I did miss my honey! This is a very fresh and very good feeling.

It wasn't always this way, however. My honey and I have a history of power struggles. At one point I threw up my hands and said, "I'm done! I just don't want this anymore."

This was the precise moment when I was able to re-create the relationship. To tell you the truth, I thought at the time I'd have to let him go. I thought it would be easier to start over than to re-create this one. And, I was willing.

However, I focused on willingness, acceptance, love, and hope instead.

Then, as if by magic, the relationship turned into the most special love of my life.

Another point I'd like to briefly discuss is one's attachment to the 'idea' about how a relationship should look. Recently a friend emailed that her partner said, "I'm just not good at relationships and marriage just doesn't suit me."

She wants marriage and he doesn't. When resistance to the relationship comes in the form of resistance to the 'structure' of the relationship, you will want to consider whether it's the 'form' or the 'love' that is the most important.

It's okay to want marriage and if your partner doesn't want that, you may have to let them go. Or, you may find that it's easier and more aligned with what you want to let go of the 'form' and love the relationship and your mate exactly as they are. Remember, millions of couples are happily (and permanently) coupled without the 'form' of marriage.

If you want to re-create a relationship, inspire it to be all that you desire, you must start with that willingness that I mentioned above. Then send forth such a great deal of unconditional love and acceptance that the light from your heart transforms the situation.

At some point there will be a fork in the road; an opportunity to stay because it's obvious that you can use the power of love to support the relationship you want or an opportunity to let it go. In spite of your love for your mate, it will become obvious that it would be easier to accept them as they are and let them go than to change them (and your thoughts about them).

Your intentional unconditional love and acceptance will either inspire the relationship to new heights of adoration or you will become acutely aware of the relationship's incapacity to give anymore than it's already giving.

At this point, you won't be able to judge them for being the way they are. Instead, you will honor the Divine within them and trust that the Universal spirit is guiding you to a better relationship once you let this one go.

Either way, you will experience a peaceful resolve first. This will be your cue that you are indeed aligned with the wonderful love you desire.

Copyright, 2007: Anisa Aven, This article is available for free reprint.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Money will always flow into whatever you have created in your life to receive it!

i am taking another break from working on my project paper, and i pick up where i left off in my reading of Shakti Gawain's Living in the Light. i come to this chapter on "Money" and this line hits me like a huge universal (welcome) bop on the head, i can still see the stars exploding--

"Money will always flow into whatever you have created in your life to receive it."


no wonder when we "save for a rainy day", the rainy day comes! when we set aside amounts in our budget for medical/hospital bills, the medical/hospital expenses come!!! : O omigod. i am only seeing it clearly for the first time now.

i have long experience with almost a perpetual lack of money, and only very new experience with abundance now, but what i can relate to most was in the early years of my struggling to get the children and i out of the debts from the marriage, and to get back on our feet again, it would happen time and again that whatever extra money i earned or received (this was already during the phase where i consciously focused on abundance, not lack, always thanking for my blessings and staying in gratitude, so money always came in somehow), i would only be able to enjoy the joyous feeling for a day, at most, and then something would break down at home, some needed repairs, some new emergencies, etc., would crop up that would entail my using the new money for those.

knowing this principle now, i understand: i did not create anything new to receive the new money coming into my life, so they got channeled to whatever was there--our needs-- and since our previous needs were already met, the energy of the new money created the energy of the new needs (repairs, emergencies, etc.)!!!

ohhh, wowww.

this is interesting validation of what i've been experiencing lately, too, you see.

since november when i've updated the house mortgage arrears, i've somehow left the monthly payments slip again, because the amount i've budgeted for the monthly payments somehow get eaten up by new needs coming up every month.

well, last month, as i saw the monthly arrears piling up again, i resolved to get a grip on my self and focus on erasing that buildup again. so to help me along, i created a separate envelope and marked it "for paying off house monthly mortgage payments", and set aside an initial seed amount there covering two months (the mortgage company doesn't accept partial updating now), and placed the envelope in the bottom drawer of my dresser, so that i will not touch that money anymore (i used to just place all my money in my wallet).

well, what do you know? i noticed that since i did that, i was asked to do extra work, services, etc. which paid me additional income here and there, and which helped me now to add to the amount in the envelope, so much so that i can see my self fully updating the mortgage again by next month, at the latest!

and now, i read about this principle! (the only other principle explained in the chapter was: money is just a symbol of universal creative energies, and since universal creative energies are limitless, money can be limitless; we don't have to compete, work our lives off doing work we didn't love to do, etc. the solution is to get in the flow, do what you love, do what builds your energies up, and the money will just follow.)


so, i've just finished creating 3 more envelopes now (creating the receptacles to receive : >)--

one, marked "Additional Income/Wealth";
two, marked "Disneyworld Christmas and New Year with the kids (and M!)" : ); and
three, marked "House and Home Improvement and Beautification" (including a move to our dream home at Ayala North Point, or elsewhere better :>)

-- deliberately creating positive receptacles for money to flow in now, instead of just creating them by default (not creating at all, so new money flows into newly created needs) or negatively ("rainy days").

i'll update here on what happens with this new experiment of mine. : )

obviously, i am excited. like a kid on her new bike--

look ma, no hands! :D

The Best Definition of Meditation I've Ever Read

If you know how to worry, you know how to meditate. It simply means to think of something over and over! : )