getting out of my way

i must be getting better at this stuff, basically just getting out of my way.

i was lying in bed last night, on my tummy, drawing my budget again for the next period. i thank God that, compared to previous years at this time of year (school opening season with all the school opening expenses), i am able to meet my obligations, and even have something more to settle old standing ones. still, after drawing my budget, though, i realized that there were two things i will have to postpone for a while, as we didn't have the funds for them-- a complete car tune-up (just to get the new car on a good start) and new clothes for the kids and i (they're outgrowing theirs, thea is even wearing mine now, and my old clothes are ... well... really old, as in circa married days and even pre-married days! a lifetime ago...).

anyway, as what usually happens when i discover that my current and expected funds are not enough to cover all foresseen needs, i start getting anxious, trying to brainstorm now solutions for either how i could generate more and/or how we could live with less.

i actually started doing that, this time, marking a new page on my notebook, "Solutions", when i remembered Anisa Aven's manifesting template (you submit a manifesting story to her, she sends you this template). which basically says that manifesting is basically a three-step process: create your Intent, vibrate with your Intent (through Gratitude, faith, positive expectancy, inspired action preparing to receive your Intent), and receive your Intent. but along the way, we usually get sidetracked on a detour around and through our blocks (fear, doubt, anxiety, negative emotions and thoughts, etc.) and it is this that we need practice working through by clearing them.

for last night, though, with this remembrance and recognition, i just simply decided to not entertain the sprouting anxiety, doubts and fears. i actually wrote in my notebook with a big circle and a big star and a big arrow-- "This is for God/the Universe to work on. I will just create the space, and watch and wait."

after writing that, i went to sleep (as sleep is an effective antidote for me in chasing anxieties and blues away) at 630 pm, while waiting for dinner.

i must've overslept though, as i was only awakened by thea because of a phone call.

it was my brother, T, who shared good news-- mama's tax refund of $5000 had just come through and mama said it was to be divided among T, our sister and i!!!

oohhh wowwww.....

how faster things manifest when we are cleared of all the blocks, huh?!!!

even now, i am still sooooo amazed.

Found Abudance log

when i re-started my regular meditations last monday, i also started this "Found Abundance" log, going by the manifesting principle of paying attention to your Intentions manifesting by logging any and all signs of their manifesting, even in little bits and increments, even if they're not manifesting in the exact form you intended, so that you help the manifesting along instead of blocking it by doubting or fearing they're not happening at all. in short, it's actually Gratitude in action, and more scientifically this time. : )

i've created it in Word and placed a shortcut to it on my desktop so i can quickly and easily access it to review it and add to it each time.

so here is a copy of my "Found Abundance" log so far--

Found Abundance!

Eternal Thank Yous!

- my life, my mind, my body, my heart, my will, my talents, my experiences and lessons so far

- my children

- our good health

- our happy and safe home

- the love of our families and friends

- the love of J, and the lesser loves and lessons that came before

- our school

- my work

- my peace work

- good food

- comfortable shelter

- good clothes and shoes

- opportunities to grow and rise up to our highest potentials

- Life!

As of Tuesday, May 09, 2006 –

- Toyota Vios 1.3E

- Citibank amnesty program and surprisingly pleasant communications all throughout the negotiations

- P14,000 Pag-IBIG automatic credits to our mortgage, lessening the amount I have to update

- P1000 Iyas creative writing workshop surprise honorarium for my documenting it

- Able to meet budget at Palmas

- Able to meet budget this period/cycle without borrowing from others

- LG and WB gracefully waiting for me to finish my writing projects with them, so i can be paid

- the chance to earn extra (and develop further my speaking/training career for future income streams) from the Basic Communication Skills teaching opportunity

As of Thursday, May 11, 2006 –

- J‘s $40 arriving quicker than expected, one day only instead of two days!

- Mrs. S told me I have honoraria for catalogue updating, even if it’s my half summer load!

- A approved my enrolling at TRANSCEND Global Univeristy for online PJ course, tuition to be taken from Project funds’ staff development budget!

- When I get paid from the Basic Communication Skills training, and in addition to my projected savings of 10k from TBS commission, I will have already covered two months of my Citibank monthly 12k payables to fully settle my account with them by November!

Thank You, God –

for all the Blessings we have received,

for all the Blessings we are receiving,

and all the Blessings coming our way!!!

the difference

life with and without my regular meditations...

see the difference here.